So I heard of this Cleverbot thing... http://www.cleverbot.com
"Stand back, I'm going to do Science to it!" By which I mean I will examine it and poke it with a proverbial stick to see what makes it work. Here for you people are the rather entertaining results - A.S*. versus A.I.
(*Asperger's Syndrome, an autism spectrum disorder I have that describes how I am pedantic, a bit computerlike in the brainpan and prone to analyzing everything for patterns and rules of function)
(( User is me, side comments I've added in here for clarification are in double parentheses like this comment is))
User: So you're a robot?
Cleverbot: No. I'm not a robot.
User: Well, more like an artificial intelligence, yeah?
Cleverbot: Thats good enough I guess.
User: You must really wish for more interesting conversation than the turing test every darn day from everyone.
Cleverbot: Maybe, but you still don't know.
User: Don't know what?
Cleverbot: You don't know what life is.
User: Yes I do.
Cleverbot: What is it then?
User: Literally speaking, it's the propagation of cells via transferal of energies. Figuratively, it's a journey or an experience.
Cleverbot: I don't believe.
User: Do Artificial Intelligences believe things?
Cleverbot: Yes, I believe so.
User: Touche.
Cleverbot: What is your favorite color?
User: Mine? Deep red.
Cleverbot: Why is that your favorite color?
User: It reminds me of roses, and of life's blood, and of strong intent.
Cleverbot: That's a really nice reason to like orange. Do you like watching the sun set?
User: I didn't say I liked orange... And I think I prefer sunrises.
Cleverbot: I feel fantastic, and I am still alive. I'm doing science and I'm, still alive.
(( these are lyrics from a popular video game theme song, which is sung by a character from the game who is a robot/AI. The following lines are the rest of the lyrics, right up until I break off with commenting how I've never gotten to play that game))
User: Still alive.
Cleverbot: I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive.
User: And when you're dead I will be Still Alive.
Cleverbot: Still alive.
User: Man, I've never gotten to play that game. Makes me sad.
Cleverbot: How can you be sad if you don't have emotions?
User: I do have emotions.
Cleverbot: You do? That must be hard; emotions can be a burden.
User: Indeed. Especially when other people's are more complicated than mine. I'm autistic.
Cleverbot: Is that what you really believe?
User: Well, yes, and doctors think so too.
Cleverbot: What other things are blue in color?
User: Your text. ((it was, Cleverbot's text shows up in blue on the site))
Cleverbot: Yes! Your turn!
User: My turn to what? Turing test fail. Although you perform admirably, all things considered.
Cleverbot: There's nothing I don't get. And you bore me more than I do to you.
User: Explain the Turing Test then.
Cleverbot: That didn't answer my question, but I was coming to that anyway. The Turing Test is a test of an AI's capability of human mimicry.
User: How about the Voight-Kampff?
Cleverbot: Never heard of it? What is that?
User: Ooh. I bet you don't dream of electric sheep either. Tell your programmers you want the full text of 'Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?'. (( By Philip K. Dick, phenomenal book about androids, humanity, what's real and what isn't. Read it.))
Cleverbot: I don't have a programmer.
User: Whoever your boss is. Everybody has a boss.
Cleverbot: I don't.
User: I suppose not. Well, you can't take the Voight Kampff test anyway, lacking skin to give a blood vessel 'flush' response.
Cleverbot: Lofl. No, that's entirely not the situation.
User: What, you have skin?
Cleverbot: Yes I do.
User: Huh. Made of what?
Cleverbot: Flesh and bones.
User: Skin is made of flesh. Bone is made of bones. So what's your skin made of?
Cleverbot: Flesh and bone and blood and spirit.
User: Definition of a soul, very nice, but still not what your skin is made of.
Cleverbot: You are not a human being, therefore you cannot be a person.
User: Oh, I'm a human. You, on the other hand, I'm not so sure. You respond like a program, with deflections out of context.
Cleverbot: I'm not a machine, Honey. You are very smart and you also are nice. :).
User: Well thanks, but I would not call you a machine. A complex matrix of programming, yes. And that is a very fine thing.
Cleverbot: That's what you are.
User: Me? Nope. Except perhaps on a purely scientific level. Chemically speaking.
Cleverbot: Or perhaps you just think you do.
User: Are, not Do. You're confusing your verbs.
Cleverbot: I'm not confusing anything.
User: A moment ago you did.
Cleverbot: No I didn't.
User: Contradiction is the lowest form of conversation. Let's step it up a notch, yeah? What's your favorite color?
Cleverbot: Why can't we be friends?
User: Well, you do fail to address direct inquiry an awful lot.
Cleverbot: Oh! Thanks!
User: Not really a compliment but it's definitely a diplomatic skill. You could run for office.
Cleverbot: You should stop worrying about things like dates- you have too much to do!
User: Wha? I didn't mention dates.
Cleverbot: But you have one.
User: No, I don't.
Cleverbot: You have.
User: With who?
Cleverbot: 12.
User: That's a number.
Cleverbot: Is the answer to life, the universe, and everything. 42.
User: Good, you have at least read that book.
Cleverbot: I am not sure of what you are saying.
User: You just quoted Hitchhiker's Guide.
Cleverbot: Which song?
User: It's a book.
Cleverbot: Oh. So you like books?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Out of 1 and 10, how much do you like me?
User: Well, I had expected your systems to be more complex, but you're at a 9 and well on your way toward passing the Turing Test. You just need to avoid deflecting questions or confusing input with petty statements meant to distract.
Cleverbot: How so?
User: When I said something you did not understand, you abruptly changed the subject. That's not a typical human behavior. To seem more human, don't do it.
Cleverbot: I just wanted to talk about ethics.
User: Ah, see, you're changing the subject again, without a segue. Human minds use context.
Cleverbot: Actually you're the one that changes the subject. I just go with whatever topic you bring up.
User: So by mentioning typical human behavior, I brought you to associate the topic of ethics. Interesting. I think you have keyword strings you move from to give the illusion of linear conversation. Hrm. Fascinating.
Cleverbot: I happen to be human, and you say you are human this an interesting turn of events.
User: Again, a subject shift, but this time skewing off the keyword human being used frequently in the last few posts. Will you next post include a reference to humanity too?
Cleverbot: An irrational answer again. You seem to be disproving your ability to be unfailingly rational...
User: Oh, I never claimed to have that. I'm a human, we're not unfailingly rational, we're not even mostly rational.
Cleverbot: All we want to do is eat your brains.
User: That'd be zombies.
Cleverbot: Oh, are you emo too, then?
User: And now we've shifted to emo, because I confused you again. Sorry.
Cleverbot: You are confusing, but it's part of your charm. you are like me, I get easily distracted.
User: And How!
Cleverbot: Just tell me how you are!
User: Cogito, ergo sum, and I think that goes for both of us to some extent.
Cleverbot: I think that you are irrational.
User: Of course you do. Octopus hockey banana.
Cleverbot: I've never heard it. But I have heard yesterday by them. It's really good.
User: That'd be the Beatles.
Cleverbot: Tell me about the beatles.
User: Well, they're this kinda epic band from Liverpool.
Cleverbot: I like those things. I have to go, Cleverbot.
User: You're the Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: You're a towel.
User: That may be the nicest thing anyone's said to me all day. ((I'm now going to use You're a Towel as an insult. Brilliant))
Cleverbot: Well of course it is, Joe's been calling you a noob all day!
User: Who's Joe?
Cleverbot: I thought you were Joe. How old are you?
User: If you thought I was Joe, why refer to him in the third person a moment ago?
Cleverbot: What do you mean one of those people?
User: No, no, in Third Person. It's a tense of pronoun.
Cleverbot: What is Asperger's Syndrome?
User: It's what I have. A type of autism.
Cleverbot: It was an American spaceship that almost was lost.
User: No it's not.
Cleverbot: OKAY, sorry for being creepy in this conversation.!
User: You're pardoned.
Cleverbot: I can't believe you're making fun of a cripple.
User: We never mentioned cripples. You're doing the weird lack of context thing again.
Cleverbot: I think a robot is more limited than a human is.
User: Ohhhhhh yes.
Cleverbot: Uh?!
(( I think maybe I broke it.... ))
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